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Here’s something to listen to. This is a CNS report about Mass in the slums of Nairobi, Kenya. Take a minute to listen. Even taking into account cultural differences, these people put us to shame. I wonder if we weren’t so rich, if we didn’t have so much wealth that we can afford to squabble and bicker over things God doesn’t care about, would we celebrate more truly?
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You may remember that Julianna has been in underwear for two weeks. I got this note, in a plastic bag full of diapers, from Julianna’s teacher this week: “We are sending Julianna’s diapers home because she keeps trying to put them on. We had her say ‘goodbye’ to them. We will keep a couple here just in case.” 🙂
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You know how kids of a certain age always want what someone else has? That’s been my all-but-twins kiddos for the last couple of months. We’ll give them the same cereal in identical bowls, and they’ll sit across the table from each other and howl for what the other one has. More than once I’ve switched their bowls, just to pacify them. Jeez Louise.
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But guess what? Now they’ve taken it a step farther. Case in point: two days ago, they both decided they were done with breakfast about the same time–both without finishing their cereal. As soon as Julianna got free of Mommy, she made a beeline for Nicholas’s chair and climbed up, made herself at home, and helped herself to his leftovers. Nicholas stood at her leg, yanking on her clothes and screeching like a banshee in protest. I took the cereal bowl away from her and said, “Nicolas, do you want this?” He shook his head decisively. No, he didn’t want his cereal, he just didn’t want HER to have it, OR his chair!
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We started watching The Blind Side last night. It’s a great movie, by the way. If you don’t know it, it’s about a white woman who takes in a black high school student with nowhere to go, a kid that everybody’s given up on, written off as stupid because his IQ is low and he doesn’t talk much. That’s a horrible oversimplification, but it’ll do to introduce my point. At one point in the movie, one of the main character’s friends says, “You’re changing that boy’s life.” The main character says, “No. He’s changing mine.”
It got me to thinking about this somewhat predictable plotline. These inspiring movies, which take the underdogs, the ones that everybody overlooks and doesn’t see their value, and shows how they change the rest of us for the better. It’s a familiar enough plot that we (American culture) give Sandra Bullock an Academy Award and nominate the movie for Best Picture. And yet we (American culture) fail to see that this stock plot is a true reflection of life with all those whom we (American culture) view to be without value. Of course I’m speaking again of my chromosomally-gifted daughter. But it occurs to me that this is worthy of its own blog post. So I’ll hold off for Monday on this topic.
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Alex is fast approaching his sixth birthday, and he’s starting to show interest in lots of things. I am absolutely determined that I will not get him over-involved. Christian & I are working on coming up with a solution to the activities conundrum. Our family already has activities three afternoons and three nights a week (not a complete overlap, either), even before the kids start up sports etc., and those activities constitute family income: i.e., teaching music lessons. So we’re going to have to come up with a solution. Those of you whose kids are older, how do you deal with this? I’ll confess up front I”m not a fan of the “one sport per season” solution; the seasons overlap too much.
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My initial thought is to let him figure out the one or two things he really likes and call the line at those. In the meantime, we are taking baby steps. He did T ball last summer and will again this year, but down the line we might let him try soccer, in which he’s expressed interest. And today, he’s taking his parent-teacher conference day off and going to a children’s theater workshop. We’ll see what he takes to. Of course I dream of having a drummer in the house, but I want him to find his own true love. He and his best friend both have mom and dad who are semi-professional-to-full-time-professional musicians, and neither one of them lists music as their favorite class at school. Alex loves art and P.E. So I’m anxious to see what he settles on for the short term and for the long-term.
Have a great weekend!
Kathleen M. Basi 
Yay for Julianna saying goodbye to her diapers! That’s a terrific feeling! 🙂
As for activities…we do something in the summer (softball for the girls) and when Sarah got old enough to do sports for school (3rd grade) she started volleyball in the fall, basketball in the spring and this year will run track. Of course, I’m coaching two of the three…so we’re both there anyway. Dani does basketball (Kindy and this year in 1st grade) and that’s a nice school year activity for younger kids and it’s enough (in my oh-so-humble-opinion, right?) I’ll put Helen in the Kindy “smart start” basketball program next year in Kindergarten and then basketball with the community center until she is in grades where the school puts teams together. It’s difficult though. The kids do have to choose earlier than I think is healthy to do one thing or the other. Lots of girls in Sarah’s class do just dance because that gets competitive in something like 1st or 2nd grade and it’s a year-round commitment with no time (or money!) for anything else. Good luck, though…it’s a difficult balance.
Michelle–don’t be too impressed by Julianna; she turned around and sat down on the toilet without pulling her pants down yesterday. 🙂
I hyperventilate thinking about the schedule you outline. I do think this is probably one of the reasons that people choose to have smaller families. But generations past had basketball teams and soccer teams and dance classes; surely they had to choose, too? Why is it so different now? I ask that honestly. I am truly confused. Or is this one of those cases where the memory edits out what it doesn’t want to remember? IOW, were families ALWAYS running at the frenetic pace of today and they just don’t remember it?
I’m not sure. I know we were busy with swim team year round from the time I was 10 until I was 13…all five of us on the swim team. Then we started the junior high and high school sports. But then, sports were very important to us. Oh yeah and I also took piano lessons for a few years in there. We were always busy…I don’t think I know how to do life any other way.
It is crazy, but I guess I take solace in the fact that it isn’t forever.
Also, a wonderful doctor of my sister’s who had her 7th child last year…when asked by my sister “how is it now…with 7 I mean?” said, “You know…we’re busy and it’s hectic…but we’re not busy because of the baby. And it would be hectic with or without the baby” 🙂
Congrats to Julianna, looking forward to your post inspired by ‘The Blind Side”
Scheduling: I have the opposite worry at the moment and am trying to find some activity for the summer when school ends.
We were lucky our kids never got into the sports scene. Our oldest tried a few sports, but quit when he got to high school. But we’ve stayed plenty busy with music activities. Just take it one year at a time. You don’t have to plan out the kids’ activities for the rest of their life right now. I think you have a good plan letting him try things as he shows an interest. Re-evaluate each year. You’ll figure it out.